Before I say anything, I need to state that my son is only 2.. so this may be different when kids are other ages.
As parents we all have or will go through the stage of the terrible twos. Around this age our kids do not want to listen to a word we say, and have tantrums that make angry tigers look like kittens. To top it off many of us have baby number two right around this age, like me. And when that happens, your child goes through a major jealousy streak.
Now, all children are rowdy to a point. But then there are a few who like to play a little more roughly than the other kids. This is how my little boy is, and I wouldn't have him be any other way.
Now before you all go and think that he is a bully.. he is absolutely not. When I say that he is rough I mean that he will grab people and try to hug them to get their attention, likes to jump around, run around (very rough and tumble), and he is very loud and likes to growl and "rawr" at people.. because my son likes to think he is a dragon. This scares a lot of kids and it makes them not want to play with him. I also get a lot of weird looks from parents when my son awkwardly will look at a kid he wants to play with and start things off by saying, "RAWR! i'm a dragon!" My son has grown up with all 3 of his uncles ranging in ages from 15-20. And as a kid growing up we were all very rough with each other. Not only that, but me and my husband like to play rough and tickle and play wrestle.
I have recently become very frustrated when I try to take my boy to playgrounds and play places. So many kids will turn him down and not want to play with him because he is running around and yelling like the little crazy boy that he is. And certain parents who happened to have more calm children look at me like there is something wrong with my child and me. And it is SO frustrating I cannot even explain in words how it makes me feel. For example.. Today I was at a McDonald's play place with my son. There were too many kids to count playing and running about. And every single kid (granted they were all at least a year or two older than him) turned him down and wouldn't play with him, all just because he tried to jump right in and play. Eventually he just started playing by himself, which hurt my heart seeing him sad and playing alone. After a little while most of the kids went home, except for this cute little girl. My son tried to go up and play with her, and he was running around, jumping on things, and "rawring" like he was a dragon, all with a huge smile on his face. And she would stick her arm out and push him away and then run to her dad saying that he was being mean to her. And her dad obviously knowing that my son was not, was telling her that he was just trying to play. But she didn't care, and still would avoid him at all costs.
This hurt my feelings so bad, because all I want is for my boy to be able to play with other kids. Now I know that not all kids like to play rough. But that doesn't mean its wrong when my son does, or when ANY other child does! That is just how some kids play.
But then when that other 1 out of 100 child will come up to my boy on the playground and be just as hyper as he is I feel a huge sigh of relief. And I will see them both yelling and "rawring" at each other, laughing and just having a great time. Most of the time when this happens, me and the other parent will look at each other with relief, knowing that we are not alone. And me being the idiot that I am.. will never remember to get their information, so that we can have play dates and what not.
The reason I am posting this is because I truly believe that there is nothing wrong with my child being a little extra rowdy. I have taught him not to be mean, or hit people, and I occasionally have to remind him that he needs to have a space bubble. But there is absolutely nothing wrong with my child playing the way he plays or being the way that he is. Just because one parent happened to have children that are more mellow, or shy on the playground does not mean that is how all kids are supposed to be. And it most certainly does not mean that there is anything wrong with my son.
You will find all kinds of posts on the internet about how to "mellow" your children out. And unless your child is being mean spirited, or rude, I don't think its fair to try and change them, just because you feel that they are a little more rowdy. Some parents feel that they have all the answers for having perfect little children. And maybe some parents were just blessed with little angels, so they feel like all of their teaching methods work. And one day maybe that parent will be blessed with a little rowdy child and realize that they DON'T have all the answers.
All kids play differently, some are shy, rough, hyper, sensitive, a leader, a follower, anything.. there is nothing wrong with the way your child wants to play with other kids. Again, I need to state that there is a specific difference with bullying. I feel that in a lot of ways my son has been bullied on the playground. When other kids don't like the way he is running around, and they will push him down and tell him to go away, or try to block him off from certain areas of the playground. And usually in this scenario there is no parent to be seen.. which is usually frustrating, because I am not a playground nazi, and I will usually never tell another mothers child what to do.
Hopefully this will give some other mom out there the comfort she needs in knowing that she is not alone with her kids playing "rowdy" with other kids. I sure as hell know that I feel the greatest comfort when I see other kids that are just as crazy as mine.
You can judge me if you want and say that maybe I am doing it all wrong by letting my son be the way he is. But I will not care, because he is perfect just the way he is, just the way your kids are perfect the way they are.
Thanks for reading! ♥
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